infinite-monkey-db

The eventually-correct database!

npm install infinite-monkey-db
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INFINITE MONKEY DB!

This is definitely* the database you're been looking for.

npm install infinite-monkey-db

FEATURE BULLET LIST

  • ZERO storage footprint.
  • It has ALL the letters in CAP. Bet you can't say that about YOUR database.
  • It has ALL the letters in ACID. And it isn't even SQL!
  • Super low memory overhead.
  • Zero possibility of data loss.
  • Transactions! These are a thing that you'd care about with lesser databases.
  • Quantum replication! This isn't actually a thing, but it sounds super fast, right?
  • Asynchronous -- your query may take some time, we're not about to block you from doing other cool stuff.
  • You already know the query language. Well, you do if you know Regular Expressions.

Requirements

  • It probably/definitely won't work unless your system is Unixy.
  • Your system must have at least one CPU.
  • Node.js
  • Patience.

Usage

var query = require("infinite-monkey-db")

query(/abc/, function (results) {
  // Notice we didn't even have to insert it first? WEBSCALE!
  console.log(results)
})

CLI

$ node -e 'require("infinite-monkey-db")(/abc/, console.log)'
I found your results, and it only took 7995392 bytes and 746ms!
abc

Methods

  • require("infinite-monkey-db")(regex, cb) -- Query for your data! Return it in cb(results)
  • query(regex, cb) -- (alias to above)
  • save(...) -- Sure why not?

Options

  • debug: set to false to disable helpful messages. Why would you want to do that?
  • max: set to a number to limit the search-space for your results. Reduces the odds of your query's success from 100% to some number less than 100%
var q = require("infinite-monkey-db")
q.debug = false
q.max = 1024

q(/Alas, poor Yorick!/, console.log)

*(not)

LICENSE

Free as in Hugs License

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