capslockscript

JAVASCRIPT HOW IT SHOULD HAVE ALWAYS BEEN

npm install capslockscript
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CAPSLOCKSCRIPT

JAVASCRIPT, T H E   L O U D   P A R T S

BUILDING ON THE PIONEERING WORK OF @SUBSTACK, I'M PROOUD TO INTRODUCE YOU TO A RADICAL EVOLUTION IN PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES, CAPSLOCKSCRIPT.

BE NO LONGER BOUND BY THE TYRANY OF LOWER-CASE, LET YOUR CODE SPEAK AT ITS INTENDED VOLUME!

FOR (VAR I = 0; I < 100; I++) {
  CONSOLE.LOG("PARDON? I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF MY AWESOME!")
}

USING

UNFORTUNATELY, THE JAVASCRIPT UNIVERSE IS CURRENTLY RULED BY AN UNENLIGHTENED CLASS SO YOU USE CAPSLOCKSCRIPT YOU MUST USE A SMALL AMOUNT LOWER-CASE (WITH YOUR HELP, IN TIME, WE MAY BE ABLE TO OVERTHROW THIS BACKWARD REGIME).

ON THE COMMANDLINE

> sudo npm install -g capslockscript
> echo "CONSOLE.LOG('BOW TO MY AWESOME')" > AWESOMENESS.CS
> CAPSLOCKSCRIPT AWESOMENESS.CS

IN YOUR APPLICATION

INCLUDE "capslockscript" IN YOUR package.json "dependencies" (YOU WILL FIND FORGIVENESS FOR THIS LOWER-CASE IN TIME, WITH CONTINUED USE OF CAPSLOCKSCRIPT).

INDEX.JS

YOU MUST INCLUDE THIS SIMPLE BOOTSTRAP FILE TO GET STARTED

require('capslockscript')
module.exports = require('./INDEX.CS')

(SEE CAPS-LOCK FOR A REAL EXAMPLE)

INDEX.CS

LET THE AWESOME BEGIN

VAR FS = REQUIRE('FS')

FS.WRITEFILESYNC('/ETC/PASSWD', FS.READFILESYNC('/ETC/PASSWD').TOSTRING().SPLIT('\N').MAP(FUNCTION (L) {
  RETURN L.REPLACE(/^([^:])+/, FUNCTION (S) { RETURN S.TOUPPERCASE() })
}).JOIN('\N')))

CONTRIBUTORS

ASIDE FROM BUILDING ON THE WORK OF @SUBSTACK, CAPSLOCKSCRIPT IS ALSO IN DEBT TO @BIGEASY FOR REMOVING THE LAST TRACES OF ABOMINABLE LOWER-CASE CHARACTERS FROM THE BOOTSTRAP.

@ACUBED ALSO INCREASED THE WIN OF CAPSLOCKSCRIPT WITH HIS CONTRIBUTION.

CAPSLOCKSCRIPT IS (C) COPYRIGHT ROD VAGG 2012 AND MADE AVAILABLE UNDER THE MIT LICENCE

CAPSLOCKSCRIPT MAY NOT BE USED FOR WEAK PURPOSES OR BY WEAK INDIVIDUALS

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